Sabbath love-making: Is it biblical?

“Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy. (9) Six days shalt thou labour, and do all thy work: (10)  But the seventh day is the sabbath of the LORD thy God: in it thou shalt not do any work, thou, nor thy son, nor thy daughter, thy manservant, nor thy maidservant, nor thy cattle, nor thy stranger that is within thy gates: (11) For in six days the LORD made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that in them is, and rested the seventh day: wherefore the LORD blessed the sabbath day, and hallowed it.” – Exodus 20:8-11

The age old question for Sabbath-keepers arises – what is appropriate for the Sabbath day and what is not? Many have tossed ideas around concerning various activities from swimming to getting wet to walking a number of steps, etc. One of the questions people wonder about is love-making between spouses upon the Sabbath day. That is, is marital (between a husband and wife) sex okay on Sabbath? Some would blurt out a quick yes. Some might hesitate. Others would give a certain, “no!” While there does not seem to be a Bible text that gives us an explicit answer dealing a verdict directly on the matter, there are however some biblical principles that we can briefly explore to give us more clarity to the issue.

Please consider the following biblical principles in formulating your understanding of the matter:

• Procreation – Sexual encounter with your spouse is in one sense a matter of reproducing life. In fact, we all got here through “sex.” God said to Adam and Eve, “Be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28). Did God “create” on the Sabbath, or rest from His creative work? He rested, of course! And He commanded that people should do the same. So, should we potentially be pro-creating upon the Sabbath day? Doesn’t seem to fit the activity of rest from creative labor or action.
• Sanctity of the Sabbath – God “hallowed” or made holy the Sabbath day. That is, He made it for a holy purpose. Now, some might debate whether or not sex is a “holy” thing between a husband and wife [though it is certainly within holy guidelines, when married], but if we get down to the biblical definitions of holiness and purity and commonness, then it will not take us very long to realize that Sabbath is holy while the act of sex is a “common” matter. In the following points, we’ll see this in scripture.
• Holy vs. Common – Exodus 19 – When God came down upon Mt. Sinai He asked Moses to “sanctify” (i.e. to set apart as holy) the people, so that they could withstand the glorious presence of God being near to them without them dying. As Moses went to “sanctify” the people he instructed them to “be ready” for God’s appearance upon the 3rd day and to “come not at your [their] wives” (Exodus 19:14-15). In other words, they were not to have sexual contact with their wives (lawfully wedded spouses) when preparing to meet the LORD and His holy presence. Their minds were to be upon high, lofty, holy themes. God clearly considered this activity a “common” matter and not a “holy” activity, although lawful sex between man and wife is part of a holy life, not taking away at all from holiness, even as eating food, though not a holy act, is still a valid part of a holy life.
• Eating the bread of life – In the days of David he came to the priest Abiathar with his men and they were all very hungry and had no food. They asked if there was bread to eat. The priest said that there was only holy bread there. He then asked “if the young men have kept themselves at least from women” (See 1 Samuel 21:4-6). This standard of whether they had laid or not with a woman recently was used to determine whether or not an exception could be made in allowing them to eat from the “holy bread.”  The holy bread was only to be eaten by the priests who were holy and who had been consecrated/dedicated to God’s service. In how this matter came up, it shows us that the act of sex, or sleeping with a wife was not considered to be in harmony with eating the holy bread on the same day, by these. If defiled or made unclean by sex on that day, they could not eat. However, with space between the act of sex and the eating of the bread, by a matter of days, the eating could be allowed for their pressing need. In an interesting expansion on this, Jesus is said to be the “bread” which came down from Heaven (John 6). The Sabbath is about Jesus to whom when we come, we find rest (Matthew 11:28). Therefore, in meeting Jesus, the holy bread of life within the bounds of “his holy day” (the Lord’s day – Sabbath, Isaiah 58:13-14), we should be sure we are clean and of proper mind to focus on Him.
• Unclean if the seed spills out – According to Leviticus 15:16, “if a man’s seed of copulation” was to come out of him, he was considered “unclean” until the evening (i.e. til the end of the day), and was to bathe in water. It would then stand to reason from this as well that the activity of sex was considered “common,” instead of holy. It is considered part of the lower nature (body), rather than the higher (spiritual, mind – to which powers of the body are ever to be subjugated), although none can argue that mind and spirit are unaffected by sensations of the body. Should one be “unclean” upon the Sabbath day when planning to worship the holy God? It would seem that we ought to strive to be pure and “clean” to meet with our holy God upon His holy day – a day which begins at “evening” and ends at the next “evening” (Lev. 23:32).
• Our own pleasure or delight in Him? Isaiah 58:13-14 speak about delighting “in the LORD” upon His Holy Sabbath day, not defiling it, and “not finding our own pleasure” upon His holy day, or even speaking our own words (meaning, words which are not aligned with holy Sabbath sanctity). Therefore, the Sabbath is a day to delight in the LORD and to think of Him, not even speaking our own words. So, what about sex? Are we delighting in the Lord or in ecstasy and physical pleasure with our spouse? Some might say that it points us to the LORD who gives such joys with our spouses. However, the point remains that “our own pleasure” does indeed come to us in sex, and we generally would delight in the physical ecstasy of the moment rather than the spiritual joys of contemplating our holy Creator. Would our minds be on God – the Creator, or on personal and spousal pleasure – the creature, rather than the creator who is blessed for ever? [let us not be “lovers of pleasure, rather than lovers of God” – Romans 1:25; 2 Timothy 3:4]. We could even ask if our “words” would be in harmony with Sabbath holiness, or if they would be “our own words” on topics different than the holy themes of contemplation which God desires upon the Sabbath.

From these points, we can begin to form some conclusions about what is right to do in this matter. In this article, it is not my aim to cast “a snare” upon anyone, but rather to consider what God has in mind for ultimate joy through His plan. Based on the evidence, that plan seems to be: sacred and eternal joys in God upon the holy Sabbath, while sensual, common, and temporal joys are for the six common working days each week.

In drawing conclusions, we can ask, “Am I procreating (creating) upon God’s day of rest from creation?” Should I? Is this a holy purpose or a common one? Am I prepared to eat the holy bread of life – the spiritual goodness of Jesus Christ upon the Sabbath by indulging the fleshly desires upon the Sabbath? Am I making myself or my spouse ceremonially “unclean” upon God’s holy day? Am I experiencing my “own pleasure” or delighting in Him on the Sabbath?

Let us think of God’s principles and His intent for the Sabbath. What is that intent anyway? Holy rest, delighting in God, and improving our relationship with the holy God. So, the next time you think about possible physical pleasures upon the Sabbath, why not think about getting into God’s presence instead, being intimate with Him, and delighting in the joys of His presence? It’s a higher, holier, more pure, beautiful, and ennobling experience than any other possible pleasures we might enjoy during the common days of the week.

Let us not be as those who “have violated my [God’s] law, and have profaned mine [His] holy things: they have put no difference between the holy and profane [common], neither have they shewed difference between the unclean and the clean, and have hid their eyes from my sabbaths, and I am profaned among them” (Ezekiel 22:26). Let us consider exercising the highest powers of our beings, delighting in the LORD, and connecting with Him – with His holy presence – to find our greatest joys in spiritual ecstasy with God!

Ben’s Story and Testimony | June 13, 2017

The following testimony has been available on my website for awhile now, but I figured I would add it instead to the growing collection of testimonies on my blog. If you have a desire to know my story of meeting Christ, and have some minutes to spare, I hope you’ll read on and be blessed. May God be glorified in all things for His mighty works! Amen.

Early Years

I was born and raised in the state of California, USA. My parents and grandparents (on both sides) are Bible-believing, Sabbath-keeping Christians. My parents became church-going sincere Christians since before I was born. Being raised in a Christian home I certainly learned a number of things about God and His truth. Unfortunately, my parents went through a divorce when I was around the age of six. My brother, sister, and I (the firstborn) were then raised by our mother. Around the time I was in 5th grade I developed a feeling of apathy towards regular church going. At that age I recall putting up a fuss about going to church and pretty much stopped going. Only on a rare occasion I would go when my mother at times would insist that everyone should hop in the car and go.

Life Before Christ (B.C.)

Throughout my Jr. High and High school years I was not a church-going person. I didn’t have any sort of personal devotional life with God either. To state it squarely, my interests were quite worldly. My choice of music, the movies I watched, the way I talked, the way I acted, the friends I hung out with, the subjects I spoke about, the rock concerts, and dances I attended—all spoke too clearly of my heart’s love for the world. Even through that, I’m thankful that I did make some great friends who remain friends to this day, even though we may not have the same viewpoints precisely on God (yet. smile). My thoughts were not upon God (although I might have claimed a mere belief in God’s existence, or mentioned a “love” for God if pressed to it). I hoped to figure out some way to make a lot of money for myself and to just live up the “good ol’ life” of doing whatever I pleased. I used to love attending the high school football games on Friday nights, going to school dances, playing rock music on my guitar, racing my car around town with the others on weekend nights, cranking up the music, attending parties, and chasing after pretty women! Although this kind of lifestyle often tells of drugs and alcohol use as well, thankfully, I never got involved in that—and my friends knew me for it too. Something about my early Christian upbringing just told me that it would be a worthless and perhaps “stupid” way to waste away life and health! By God’s grace I was spared from those health-destroying vices, but nonetheless, my heart was filled with the world.

How I Met Christ

What changed my life? Meeting Jesus Christ personally made all the difference! Around the first year of College I was taking classes at a local Junior College in my home town area of Chico, California (Northern part of the state). Life seemed to have lost its direction for me. My job at that time had gotten too old for me, and I was wondering where exactly things would go with College. I started out taking business and general education classes (still hoping later to “make it rich!”). However, there was something missing in life. It all just started to seem so empty.

I had begun asking some of the bigger questions of life. What is my purpose? What is the point of it all? You just work hard, and then you die. I began to develop a depression in that year. Subsequently, I started doing poorly in my classes as well. Unbeknownst to me at the time, some of the rock music I was listening to was also leading to my depressing thoughts. And missing God, though I didn’t realize it, was leading to my emptiness. My heart could fully resonate with the words of Solomon in the book of Ecclesiastes, “…Vanity of vanities, all is vanity. What profit has a man from all his labor in which he toils under the sun? One generation passes away, and another generation comes; but the earth abides forever” (Ecclesiastes 1:2-4, NKJV). Man is doomed to die, and eventually all our labor under the sun weighs up to nothing more than “vanity.” Worthless and empty is a life without God, hope, truth or eternal purpose. The earth just goes on forever, but your life will be forgotten along with the dust. That about summarized it! I was searching for true meaning and purpose in life, but couldn’t find it.

Thankfully, God had a plan! I joined the speech and debate team at my local Jr. College. I wanted to sharpen my skills for business and for life. While there, I got connected with some good Christian friends who were always so positive about life, and who were full of love for God and man. They chose to live differently from the world, and to uphold what was right. Their friendship brought more happiness and joy to my life. Suddenly, I began to see a different side of God. A side I’d never quite seen before. A side of love and joy and true fulfillment; a side of purpose, meaning, and hope for this life and beyond! Struck by this new impression, I decided it was time to read my Bible and to pray. I’d never really read the Bible much of any before, but now it was time to find out just what exactly was in that book which people would sometimes speak of in various ways.

I wanted to be a joyful Christian person, but I wanted to know for sure who this God really was. I opened up to the book of Matthew chapter 5, Jesus Christ’s most famous sermon, the Sermon on the Mount. As I began to read the Holy Spirit began to convict me! Never before had I quite realized the holiness of God in such a way! I was struck right to the heart by the pure and holy words of Jesus. Christ said, we shouldn’t even “look at a woman to lust after her in our heart,” and if we did, that was like committing adultery “in our hearts!” (Matthew 5:28).

Oh, the pure and high standard of God! I thought, “What a terrible sinner I was!” The Holy Spirit convicted me, and I knew right away, I needed a Savior! I wanted to follow Jesus and to do things God’s way! I wanted to have the blessing and peace of God and to honor His holiness! I asked for God to be in my heart and to cleanse me from my sinfulness! From that moment my life began to change drastically! And my friends and family noticed the change too. They were shocked by it, I think.

Suddenly, I didn’t want to look at women the same way as before—they were like God’s daughters who I needed to respect. I didn’t want to listen to that rock music anymore! It was defiling to me. Suddenly, I realized there were so many terrible and unholy things bound up in every lyric of that music, which I’d never realized before. I didn’t want to watch worldly movies anymore or to play violent and evil video games. Those things were not pure and they were not of God. The worldly culture, the parties, the rock concerts, the pride and vanity of racing my car around and blaring my worldly music began to seem unappealing to me. I busted up my worldly CDs and movies—that stuff was now trash to me. I now wanted to go back to church!

My Life after Meeting Christ (A.D.)

From that time, I began to attend church faithfully! I didn’t want to miss a single week! I began praying and having a daily devotional life. I wanted to participate in things at church and to help out with the cause of God! I was hungry for the word of God! I read my Bible diligently every day and to this day I’ve not stopped my daily reading and study habit! I read it every day!

I looked for every book, tape, and sermon I could find to fill my mind with the truth of God’s word! My starving soul was now being fed. Hope, love, joy, and peace were now flowing into my life. The gospel was true and stands true today! Jesus came to destroy the devil “…and to release those who through fear of death were all their lifetime subject to bondage” (Hebrews 2:15). I had been released – set free! Praise God! It was fully evident in my life that God was at work!

“…If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new” (2 Corinthians 5:17). My life was totally being made new, and my friends and family could tell something was majorly different. Some were quite surprised and some even resentful of such a change in life, behavior, desires, and interests! But it was God’s doing, and it was “the entrance of His word,” by the impression of His Spirit that did the changing. “The law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul: the testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple” (Psalm 119:130; 19:7). It was a joyful transformation and all of heaven was rejoicing even over this one soul, as with any other, being converted from sin.

Still, I had things to learn, and still I needed to experience the full surrender of my life in baptism! During this time, Satan tried to attack my new-found faith in different ways, suggesting doubts to my mind and other such things, but God’s word fought back mightily and fed my mind with the truth needed for a stable faith. This whole conversion process had begun over the early summer and into the fall of 2003.

In the months of August and September, God brought a blessing to me that will never be forgotten! That fall (2003), there was a Revelation Seminar coming to town! Kenneth Cox Ministries was coming to the little church in Chico, California. Well, I had always heard about these “Revelation Seminars” while growing up, and just how good they were…but strangely enough, I had never attended one. Well, I made up my mind to be there, and to invite all my friends! Every night I came faithfully! I would play the guitar for the kids, and then slip into the main auditorium to hear the preacher! Incredible! Never before had my ears heard such things (at least, as I recalled)!

With crystal clarity the word of God came to life! The prophecies of the Bible came to life! God had outlined all the future of our world right up to the Second Coming of Jesus and beyond! Amazing! God and His word could be trusted beyond a shadow of a doubt! The God who held the future in His hands also held our puny lives in His hands! The other Bible teachings became crystal clear as well! Amazing! It was at this time that I fully realized my duty to be baptized as a follower of Jesus Christ! I’d never made that surrender before and now it was time. The Holy Spirit called upon me to make that step, and at the end of the meetings I became a baptized follower of Jesus Christ! Although, I did wrestle with some thoughts of whether I was ready to make that decision, I did realize that I had to do it. The evangelist told that the devil never says no, he just says “wait.” I realized that was the truth, and I made my decision real quickly and firmly to be baptized in Christ Jesus. I’ve never ever regretted that decision. In fact, I’m so eternally glad that I did!

Since that time in 2003 my life has never been the same! It has now been filled with Christ’s joy. Though trials and struggles of life may come, yet Christ’s holy presence and joy still abide. A deep conviction, calling, joy, and passion came over my life for sharing and helping out in the gospel cause! I couldn’t help but desire to share the joy, hope, and truth of Jesus Christ with every soul possible! I began sharing Bible studies with others, talking with them about God and about my faith, and doing whatever I could to help others know the blessing of Jesus Christ! It has become my passion and joy ever since that time, and God has increasingly given opportunities for me to carry out that work.

The firm conviction rests on my heart that multitudes of people are out there lost and perishing in this world without a hope or a future! Their souls are perishing for lack of knowledge regarding the truth of God and His eternal goodness! I could see no other future, but to dedicate my life fully to the service of God and the work of ministry for those who are lost, perishing, uncertain, or unlearned about the things of God. We have a great work to do before Jesus returns and it is our joy and privilege.

My Hope for You

I hope that you have been blessed by this testimony and story, and possibly even made curious about Christ Jesus, or convicted more about Him and His word through at least some part of my story, God’s word, and the evidence of what He’s done in my life. My hope and encouragement for you and for all is to follow Jesus! Get to know Him! You won’t regret it!